My heart silently goes out to the individuals that always go through those brutal times. The ones where they don’t know where to go next and who to turn to. The ones whose hearts have been under constant strain and hurt. The ones that always have the will to keep on going toward a new day, even if there’s nothing left for them when they get there. It’s when I think about those people, that I begin to realize how blessed I am and how thankful I should be. I’m learning to be a better person, so does that count as any consolation for the way I’ve acted in the past?.. I guess not.
Sometimes you love, and you learn, and you move on. And that’s okay.
… Had me fooled from the start and I quickly gave my heart
Cos I loved you, loved you, loved you
But this is what happens when you’re a lonely girl with no one to turn you
Now I’m stronger, don’t need you any longer
So get off your knees, your words don’t mean anything…
… After all the things you put me through, ooh still I come right back
But now I know the truth, I can finally see
You only want me when you’re lonely
If I say I’m gonna leave, that’s the only time you want me
Next time you need me there I won’t make it
Another late night call I won’t take it
Cos now I finally see, you only want me when you’re lonely.
Throughout this entire complicated relationship, I only asked for one thing: HONESTY. I let past your arrogance, the crude ways you treat me sometimes, and the every belittlement you make towards me, and I only pointed out that when you want to stay with her, all you had to do is just say so. Put it bluntly, say it right off because this is how to end a relationship.
Let me remind you that I may not be strong as you think, but I’ll get through. It may take a while. It will take a while but the future will hold that certainty that all things will change.
Saying things like you got committed because everyone else made you do so isn’t fair to me especially when you make every opportunity to not seem so. Things like you don’t want to hurt me and that you love me only put things into a more damaging perspective.
I am blinded by my deep affection for you and you took advantage of it. You made me believe that you genuinely reciprocated what I felt more than you are able to say in words. It is my fault as much as yours.
I don’t know. Maybe you’re an addiction. Maybe I’m a romantic. Maybe I just need your honesty, not the things you think I need to hear because you’ve long established that I can get sucked into this whole miserable hurting again if you romanticize what I need to hear.
I’m sorry. I just can’t wish you all the goodness right now.