This is an apology letter to the both of us for how long it took me to let things go.
You get tough like me and you don’t get hurt. You look out for yourself and nothin’ can touch you…
They say that you should never regret what once made you happy. I don’t regret falling for you and even though I once spent countless nights trying to imagine an alternative outcome, I can honestly say, that I’m glad it turned out the way it did. Months ago, I would lose myself in insidiously wishing that for once, I could turn back time and change all that happened. But how could I? They weren’t my actions to alter. And as I used to care, I decided not to before I became bitter. It wasn’t right. In fact, it was disrespectful, juvenile, and unnecessary. You knew what I thought about cheating. Yet while it all went down, I never once crossed your mind. Not until after.
For me, I rather lose a boyfriend than have him cheat on me or than have him constantly remind me why we are where we are now. It’s very simple. I won’t hold it against you as long as you are honest and faithful to our relationship. If someone else is able to give you something that I cannot and you’d rather take that risk, by all means, do it. As a someone who agreed to love you, I prefer to see you happy and never stuck. Now that I have clarified my stance, I guess all that is left is to thank you. Because you taught me that regardless of what people say, their actions will either make or break their credibility. I learned this from your wrong-doings. So thank you.
I can’t even laugh at the absurdity of you asking how I am. So instead I just push that hard, forced smile across my lips and nod, assuring you that, yes, I am fine and yes, things are getting better. And satisfied, but knowing, you begin your drinking and spend the rest of the night breaking my heart.
You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect – you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break – her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.
When I don’t have the strength to let you go, it’s better to do it yourself. Your empty promises speak nothing but a lingering pain
People always say that, when you love someone, nothing in the world matters. But that’s not true, is it? You know, and I know, that when you love someone, everything in the world matters a little bit more